Thursday, April 17, 2014

Brief update

Sorry for the lack of updates.  Not a whole lot has been going on.  No AF in a while, annnnnnnnd it's a BFN.  Stupid PCOS.  So, I'm making an appointment now that my insurance is finally ready to go (just got new insurance that covers infertility).  I'm going to ask for testing to see if I have Endrometriosis (let's hope not), get back on some progesterone treatments to make AF come visit me, and do a pre-TTC full-on check up.  In the mean time I need to figure out how to add this blog site link to my blog.  Hmm...

I'll update once I know when I'm being seen

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

First post here!

Hello everyone, or should I say "Hi me" since I don't yet have followers?  Hmm..

Well.. in case someone comes along who wants to follow me I'm going to continue this post as though I had followers.  I used to blog about my infertility issues when I was TTC on a different site.  If you've stumbled upon this blog, you probably know what TTC means, and if you somehow found this blog without knowing what TTC is NO FEAR!  I'll explain all the acronyms at the bottom of this post.

I have PCOS to the point where my eggs don't seem to want to drop.  It's very frustrating.  On top of my own infertility issues my DH has a low count, low motility, and low volume.  We're ALMOST at a point we'll feel ready to start trying again so I'm just getting the blog started so it's there once our journey begins.... again.

We've been TTC 8 years.  In that time we've had 3 BFPs, all resulting in miscarriages.  So, onto acronyms

AF- Aunt Flo. In other words, a nicer way of saying period. Also the Arch Nemesis of TTC women everywhere.

BD- Baby Dance. It's kind of like a rain dance, only for babies. Just kidding! It means having sex during the fertile time of month in hopes of becoming pregnant.

BFN- Big Fat Negative. If it shows on an OPK it means I'm not ovulating, if it shows on a HPT it means you're not pregnant. It's almost as bad as the Arch Nemesis, only less messy.

BFP- Big Fat Positive. Could mean ovulation time if taken on an OPK (aka BABY DANCE TIME), could mean there's a bun in the oven if the result is on a HPT.

CD- Cycle Day. You may see me say CD1, or CD13. Basically, CD1 means the DAY AF rears her ugly head. CD13 would be 13 days after I start bleeding.

CM- Cervical Mucous. There. You know what it is. Now try to focus on the cute two letters instead of their meaning, because as disgusting as talking about this may be, it's important for TTC women to keep track of it. You can find out why HERE

EWCM- Egg-White Cervical Mucous. Also explained in the link provided above.

CP- Cervical Position. This also tends to be monitored when a woman is TTC. And hey! You can check your CP AND your CM at the same time! Think of it as a time saver. But seriously, if you want to know what CP means to a TTC woman you can go HERE.

DH - Dear Husband

DPO- Days Past Ovulation. Hell I wish this was a current phrase in my life, but maybe once I begin the meds I can throw this one around a little.

HPT- Home Pregnancy Test. Self-explanatory.

IB- Implantation Bleeding. Some women experience some bleeding OUTSIDE her period when the egg implants. IB is one of the signs a lot of women who are TTC look for, even though it's not as common as some would have you believe.

IUI- Intrauterine Insemination. EXPLANATION

IVF- In Vitro Fertilization. EXPLANATION

OPK- Ovulation Predictor Kit

PCOS- Poly-cystic Ovarian Syndrome. The biggest cause of infertility in women today. SAD TRUTH

POAS- Pee On A Stick. Many TTC women claim they have POAS syndrome or a POAS addiction. When you're actually TRYING to get pregnant, the stick is tempting... very VERRRRRRY tempting. It can be an OPK or a HPT.. both are addictive.

TTC - Trying To Conceive

2WW-Two Week Wait. It's that annoying time between ovulation and when AF should be knocking on your door, while you hope and pray that you'll get that BFP instead of te dreaded aunt/arch nemesis.

Now. If you're still with me, I admit I tried to keep this blog post on the light and humorous side. But now it's time to give a serious warning.

Infertility is one of the hardest things I have gone through in my life. Knowing how wonderful of a father my DH would be, knowing how much we want children and having empty arms. Seeing people having "oops" babies while I feel broken, while I feel like I'm less of a woman because I can't seem to do what a woman is supposed to be able to do. Watching my DH feel like he's less of a man because he feels broken as well. Worrying that DH is going to leave me for a woman who can actually function, despite the fact that he's NEVER done anything to deserve anything but complete faith in his loyalty. There will be times I can approach this topic with humor. There will be times I'm sad. There will be times I'm ANGRY (ESPECIALLY when I see neglectful/abusive parents. Oh... my mind goes to "WHY are they able to get pregnant so easily just so they can hurt their kids, when DH and I WANT a child more than ANYTHING and would LOVE the child and PROTECT it... but we AREN'T GETTING PREGNANT."). It's an emotional roller-coaster. So, if you wish to follow this blog, I welcome you to share this journey with me. Buckle up though, it's going to be a bumpy ride.